Do Anti-Bullying Programs Really Work? What New York Schools (and Parents) Need to Know
Let’s cut to it. Bullying is still a problem.
It’s not just mean words. It’s kids crying in bathrooms. It’s kids faking stomachaches to stay home. It’s grades dropping, smiles fading, and sometimes—silence. That’s why anti-bullying programs exist. But do they actually work?
I’ve worked in schools for years. I’ve seen what works. I’ve seen what flops. So let’s break this down: what makes a program effective, and what’s just checking a box?
What Is an Anti-Bullying Program?
An anti-bullying program is supposed to teach kids one thing: bullying is not okay. But that’s just the surface. A good program:
Shows students how to treat others with respect
Helps bystanders learn how to speak up
Gives kids real tools to handle conflict
Helps adults spot and stop bullying early
But let’s be honest—some programs are all talk. Posters on the wall. Then everyone goes back to business as usual. And the bullying? Still there.
Do Anti-Bullying Programs Work?
The short answer? Some do. Most don’t.
Here’s why: many anti-bullying programs don’t match how bullying actually works in real life. They treat bullying like it’s just a rule problem—something a simple “don’t do that” can fix.
But bullying is sneaky. It happens in the hall, on the bus, in private messages. It’s about power. Control. Exclusion.
So programs that only say “be kind” without showing kids how to stop bullying don’t get the job done.
What DOES Work?
Let’s talk results. The best anti-bullying programs all have these things in common:
1. They’re Long-Term, Not One-and-Done
One assembly won’t fix a bullying culture. Kids need reminders. Real lessons. Conversations. Role-playing. Repetition.
This school assembly program focused on preventing bullying is one example that actually starts a real discussion and gives schools a structure to build on.
2. They Involve Everyone
Bullies. Targets. Bystanders. Teachers. Parents. It’s a team effort. The best programs bring adults and students together to set shared expectations. Everyone has a role in how to stop bullying.
3. They Focus on What Kids Actually Do
Not just what they should do—but what really happens. These programs use real-life examples. They act it out. They practice. They coach kids on what to say and do in the moment.
Common Mistakes That Make Programs Fail
Not all programs are helpful. In fact, some can make things worse.
❌ Mistake #1: Only Focusing on the Bully
Punishment isn’t prevention. If the school is only focused on discipline, the deeper issue stays hidden. Many bullies act out due to stress, trauma, or attention-seeking. Fixing behavior means addressing root causes.
❌ Mistake #2: Ignoring the Victims
Some kids don’t know how to speak up. Others are too scared. If no one helps them build confidence, nothing changes. Good programs help them find their voice and feel safe doing it.
❌ Mistake #3: Leaving Out the Bystanders
Bystanders are the game-changers. They can stop bullying in its tracks—if they know how. Training kids to see bullying and speak up is one of the most powerful parts of any successful program.
What Parents Can Do at Home
Parents, you don’t have to wait for the school. Start the conversation now.
Talk About What Bullying Looks Like
Make it clear: teasing, rumors, exclusion, pushing—it’s all bullying. Use real examples. Ask your child what they’ve seen. Ask how it made them feel.
Practice What to Say
Role-play with your child. “What would you do if someone was being mean to a classmate?” “How could you help?” Give them phrases to use. Make it normal to speak up.
Ask About School Culture
Is kindness rewarded? Do kids get away with being mean? Find out what the school’s doing to create a safe space. And if the answer is “not much”? Speak up.
Keep an Eye on Warning Signs
Sudden stomachaches before school
Lost interest in favorite things
Changes in eating or sleep
Secrecy about devices
These could be signs your child is being bullied—or doing the bullying. Either way, step in early.
What Schools in New York Should Watch For
If you’re a school administrator, here’s your checklist:
✅ Do we have a plan for preventing bullying, not just punishing it?
✅ Are we teaching students how to stop bullying when they see it?
✅ Are our assemblies and classroom talks active, not passive?
✅ Are parents involved and informed?
If not, your program might need a reboot.
Need help? Start with an assembly that actually engages your students. This school show on preventing bullying has been used by schools across New York to jumpstart change and keep it going all year.
Final Thoughts: Don’t Just “Have a Program.” Make It Count.
We don’t need another school poster. We need real action. Kids don’t learn from slogans. They learn from what they see, hear, and feel every day. That means:
Modeling kindness
Acting fast when problems come up
Teaching tools, not just rules
Bullying won’t disappear overnight. But with the right tools, kids can learn how to treat each other better—and stand up for what’s right.
You don’t need a perfect program. You need a real one. One that works. And that starts with choosing a program that actually teaches kids how to stop bullying—and keeps the conversation going long after the assembly ends.
Want to Inspire Your Students?
My “No Bully Zone” school assembly is the perfect ‘kickoff’ to a school-wide campaign for a positive environment. Filled with magic, kid-friendly humor, and loads of interaction, your teachers and students will love it. Find out more today.